THE CHAPEL SHOW
Episode: S01E06
Date: 07/03/2014

The video begins and we see The Chapel Show logo on the screen. The logo fades out and we cut to the Chapel apartment in Las Vegas, Nevada where we see the living room of the apartment has been transformed from its normal downtrodden look due to the obvious lack of money the pair has to decorate to something else entirely. The torn, beaten up couch has been replaced by a newer couch without a giant tear in it and while the couch still doesn’t look to be brand new it’s certainly clean and respectable and a definite upgrade on the previous one. On the floor of the apartment now is a yoga mat, and in the background, over by the window we saw Nate Chapel tumble out of a few weeks ago, now stands a multi-gym that looks to be considerably expensive. We see Lexy Chapel walk in front of the camera wearing a low cut top and a pair of hip hugging jeans. “What’s up fuckers?” she begins with a smile. “I’m Lexy Chapel, and did you know if you pause the video and press up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B and A then my clothes fall off? Just one to think about! Welcome to another exciting episode of the Chapel Show, and as you can see I’m now back home and things are starting to change. For once we actually had some disposable income in the last few weeks so we’ve been shopping! And I do love to shop. On top of that I have exciting news for you regarding the future of this show, but I’ll save that for a little later in the show. I wouldn’t want to spoil everything while all you boys are still touching yourselves at the excitement of the Konami code knocking my clothes off.”

She grins at the camera and winks before beginning to laugh to herself. “Yeah, don’t get me mistaken, I know exactly why you guys watch the Chapel Show, and so I thought to myself that I really had two options. I could go one way with it where I try to take the high ground, I wear a lot of clothing, keep myself covered up at all times, start talking in a posh accent – and yeah, I know, you Americans already think I sound posh enough since I’m English, but believe me I could be posher, I could start saying ‘well, one has to go walk one’s dog’, and that would just... be... so very wrong – or I could just embrace it. And after a lot of soul searching – and by soul searching, I mean I asked Nate what he thought and he said that more viewers was better – I’ve decided that I don’t really mind so much that you guys all think of me as a sexual object. I don’t mind so much that people watch the show hoping one day I’m going to take my clothes off, because maybe one day I will,” she says, pretending to be shocked at the idea before laughing again. “Actually, as weird as it sounds, I’m not opposed to that idea. I think YouTube might be, but personally I’m not. There’s something empowering about the thought of thousands of guys drooling at my feet. In fact there’s something empowering about nudity in general, and I’ve never really cared about the taboos that society says are wrong. Then again you ARE being told this by a girl who was caught masturbating by her father and a cameraman in an oh-so-embarrassing – or should that be empowering – moment that actually aired on British TV. So if people back home read that Lexy Chapel, the former Alexandra Adams, got naked on the Internet... it probably wouldn’t shock them. They’d just shake their heads and say ‘well, I saw this coming’.”

She laughs and shakes her head slowly. “Ok, I need to stop thinking about nakedness, it’s making me think about sex,” she mutters before smirking at the camera. “Speaking of sex though, there’s more on that to come later in this episode, so I know you guys are going to enjoy that! Before we move on though, I wanted to talk a little about the last few weeks not of the Chapel Show but rather of EXPRO on FX. Every week it seems at the moment is the biggest night of my life, the biggest opportunity of my career, and last week was no different because last week I had an opportunity to go one on one with Spirit Z not just in a match but in a semi-final match as EXODUS Pro seek to find a new San Diego Bay Champion. I said in the last episode that I was ready to step up and that I was ready to fill that void that Fiona Collins made when she vacated the championship, and I’m more determined now than I’ve ever been that I can do it. At EXPRO on FX #12 the match was never going to be easy, I knew that going in to it. Spirit Z had the experience and the ability, he’s been there before and on top of that he also had the power advantage as well. And he threw me around that ring and everything he did to me hurt. But I didn’t go down. I didn’t let the pain stop me. I didn’t just cower in the corner because he was the bigger man with the power game, instead I went out and I did everything I could. I fought the good fight, I battled against the odds and I won.”

She nods slowly. “I want to stand here right now and tell you how that felt, but I don’t have the words,” she says with a smile spreading across her face. “I left that ring and I was in pain but I felt something else as well, something that was far more than just the adrenaline rushing through my body allowing me to stand – because I really couldn’t stand properly when the adrenaline wore off, I can tell you that – but I still wasn’t done and I was approached by Tom Matheny and... well, when I was younger I wasn’t very good at public speaking. It wasn’t the speaking bit that bothered me; I’ve always been good at doing that. And you guys know that considering I do that all the time with you. But there was something about the public bit that just sent shivers down my spine. Whenever I’d open my mouth I’d get tongue-tied and I’d end up saying things that made absolutely no sense, or my brain would just give up on me and I’d forget the most basic of things. I swear one time in middle school I was asked my name and everyone looked at me and I genuinely couldn’t even remember it! That was NOT one of those moments that was embarrassing but empowering, that was one of those moments that I just wanted to crawl in to a hole and disappear. That moment has lived with me for a long time. So when I was approached after the match by Tom and he started asking me questions I was nervous, but it wasn’t like middle school anymore. The kids in middle school looked at me like they wanted me to fail. Every single one of them looked at me like they wanted me to embarrass myself so they could laugh and feel better about themselves, but the EXPRO on FX fans looked at me like they wanted to see me succeed!”

She trails off for a moment, looking away for a second or two to compose herself and looks like she’s genuinely touched by the reaction she got at the last show and she’s struggling to find the best way to express that. “Like I said, I don’t even have the words,” she says before nodding her head slowly, “but if I did, they’d express how thankful I was. I left a lot behind me when I came to the United States. I left my family, all the security and safety of the life I had back then, and things in the United States haven’t been easy. My wedding wasn’t the one I always dreamt about, my apartment isn’t the dream house I always imagined I’d own and I’ve got to work two jobs, both wrestling and waitressing, just to pay the bills and make my rent. So life is tough. There have been times when I’ve felt ridiculously homesick. But when I walk out in front of those people and they cheer me, when they chanted my name at the last show, I... I felt like I’d found a new home. And when guys like Blake Jones have reached out to compliment me and Jonathan Collins has gone out of his way to help me without asking for anything in exchange... I feel like those people are my new family. So I’m not very good at finding the words, but I guess what I want to say is just... thank you. I’ve fought against the odds every single time I’ve stepped in to that ring and I keep finding new challenges, bigger challenges, and all I can think right now, all I want to say right now to start things off isn’t that I’m going to do this or I’m going to do that, it’s just that I want to thank you all for everything,” she says, looking down as she’s a little embarrassed before looking back up and smiling again. “Ok, enough with the sentimental starts. We’ve got breasts and sex and stretching and all kinds of madness in this episode of the Chapel Show, so shall we move forward? I think we should!”

 “So, last time on the Chapel Show I wanted to take you a little behind the scenes, you got to see my single favourite backstage event in history when I met Jon Collins and I got to hug him – yes, I’m still psyched about getting to hug him – but this week I’m afraid that I have nothing thrilling and exciting to show you featuring anyone from EXODUS Pro. I swear you people need to get in touch with me; the Chapel Show loves guest stars! But that doesn’t mean I haven’t got some fun things for you. The question is where to start... Well, I did joke with you about getting naked, so I have something almost as good...” She winks at the camera.

The Chapel Show

The scene changes and we see the inside of an elevator, but not at a normal head height level. The elevator is very small and cramped, and while there isn’t much to make it obvious that the camera is lower down than it would be if Lexy were carrying it – even with her short stature – it’s obvious from the positioning of the buttons that we’re at a lower height, almost as though the person carrying the camera was sitting. As the camera begins to turn around we understand why the camera is at a lower height as we see Nate Chapel holding it and beginning to film himself. “Well, home again,” he mutters and lets out a long sigh. “Another day of physiotherapy and the good news is that it’s going well. The physiotherapist even thought that I could be out of the wheelchair within a few months, and I may be standing again within a few weeks. Obviously I’m pushing for quicker than a few months becauNathan Chapelse this thing is a pain in my ass – quite literally, actually. All this sitting down is actually beginning to hurt my ass, and that can’t be a good sign considering my ass is one of the things Lexy loves most about me. Well, actually I think my abs are what she loves most about me, but if I’m in this wheelchair another few months then it’s going to become a flabby man-gut and I’ll end up with a body no different to the average American. The sooner I can get back to doing ab-crunches the better.”

He lets out another long sigh before looking up, most likely at the dial above the door, to find out what floor he’s on. While there’s nothing to necessarily indicate the speed at which the elevator is moving we can sense just from Nate’s body language and the generally frustrated tone in his voice that it’s not exactly moving quickly. “God I hate this thing,” he mutters again. “Seriously, we need to find a new apartment. The only benefit this apartment has is that rent is cheap enough that we can afford it without Lexy having to break her back too, and that lets us spend our extra income on a few nicer things. I wish I’d filmed yesterday when the multi-gym arrived. She was so excited, and when Lexy gets excited... well, let’s just say it leads to a good night for me! Unfortunately the camera was in the shop after a SLIGHT accident with the dog and... Well, it’s probably best that we didn’t film that. We already have people moaning about Lexy’s potty mouth in these videos, last thing we need is the RSPCA on our asses as well. Oh, wait... what do you guys actually call your animal protection people? Dammit, I need to look that up. Maybe it’s something lame like the ASPCA? I can see the first word being ‘American’ over here. It just seems so... well, American. Back home we call it the Royal Society for the Protection of Cruelty to Animals, and I guess that’s going to be stuck in my head forever. Lexy’s probably already converted to your way though. You know she actually says ‘ass’ now? I swear, if her parents could hear her. That’s not the only Americanism she uses either. She said ‘elevator’ the other day and it took me five seconds to figure out what she was talking about.”

The elevator obviously finally reaches the right floor and there’s the sound of a bell dinging. Nate lets out a triumphant breath. “Finally, I swear this thing is getting slower and I was running out of shit to say,” he says before the doors open and he puts the camera in his lap, facing away from himself, and begins to wheel himself off the elevator. We see the corridor outside the Chapel apartment for the first time as Nate wheels himself toward the door and then turns sideways on. We hear the sound of keys jingling and then we hear the door unlocking and the next thing we see is Nate spinning himself around and wheeling himself in to the apartment. “Hey honey, I’m... whoa. Ok, you’ve got to see this!”

He picks up the camera again and films the sight that made him stop midsentence, and we see Lexy on her yoga mat stretching out in incredibly tight Lycra shorts with her ass in the air and her upper body pressed down. She just laughs her distinctive laugh. “Are you filming my ass babes?” she asks, wiggling her butt a little and giggling as she does so. “You know that the last time you filmed my ass for an extended period of time they made us take down the teaser video we included the footage in because they said it was ‘too raunchy’.”

“Well, in fairness you were in a thong,” Nate reminds her, still filming her butt and even zooming in a little now. “Aw, now that’s a sight I love coming home too! I swear Lexy has the greatest arse in professional wrestling right now.”

“Whoa, there’s a lot of competition,” she reminds him, wiggling her butt again before shifting her upper body weight and then lifting herself up on her arms so that she’s upside down with her feet in the air. She smiles at Nate lovingly from the position she’s in. “Of course when you come back there will be even more competition, but that’s because you are an ass.”

She sticks her tongue out at him playfully and his tone seems like he’s mocking injury. “Oh, you do realise your words can hurt, don’t you?” he asks before we see the camera spinning around where he’s obviously spinning quickly in the chair. We see his arm reach out and push the door closed before we see him spin the chair again and refocus on his wife in the middle of the room. “So, you didn’t tell me you were going to do more of your yoga crap this morning, I’d have stayed and enjoyed the show. I swear you have no idea how damn hot some of those positions are!”

“First off, it’s not crap. Secondly, it’s not yoga,” Lexy tells him with a shake of her head, still resting upside down on her forearms and now crunching her abs a little as she brings her legs down before kicking her legs out straight again. “I got kicked out of that yoga class, remember? I still don’t know what that girl’s problem with my outfit was. It’s not like you could actually SEE my nipples, and I had no idea that that studio was going to be THAT cold because if I did then I would have worn a bra.”

“I hate when you wear bras,” Nate tells her with a laugh.

“You hate when I wear clothes,” she points out and we can hear him agreeing with her. “But like I said, this isn’t yoga. Ok, so I stole a lot of it FROM yoga I admit, but yoga is so boring. I wanted to make mine more fun. Besides, some of the stuff they do is so easy.”

Nate just laughs. “Easy for you, but then you don’t have a spine,” he says before spinning the camera around and nodding at it encouragingly. “Really, she doesn’t have a spine. Some of the ways she can bend are just inhuman! One day, when we get the money, we’re going to rewrite the karma sutra, but include pictures and not drawings!”

“And I can just imagine how proud my mum will be,” Lexy says with a laugh as Nate turns the camera back around on her. “God, can you imagine how she’d react? She already hates the fact that I dress the way I do. I think if I actually released a sex manual she’d die. Or I’d die because my dad would hunt us down and... Well, probably kill you first. He already doesn’t like you.”

“And then you’d die of a broken heart, or kill yourself like Juliet did when she discovered Romeo dead,” Nate says in an almost romantic tone.

“Um... sure,” Lexy replies. Nate doesn’t respond verbally, and we can’t actually see his reaction, but Lexy begins laughing so hard at it she loses her balance and falls to the ground. After a few seconds she rolls over and blows a kiss at her husband. “Aw babes, you know I’m only joking, right? I would absolutely die of a broken heart if I lost you. That’s why you’re banned from ever going near any windows ever again. Ever! And considering the life insurance policy you took out after the accident if I didn’t love you wouldn’t I be trying to encourage your suicidal desires?”

Lexy pops back to her feet and begins stretching out her legs as Nate lets out a loud sigh. “I told you baby, I don’t have suicidal desires. That time I screamed about wanting to kill myself was just because I couldn’t stand listening to Bruno Mars for another second. I swear the only good song that twat has ever done is Billionaire.”

“I keep telling you, that was Travie McCoy,” Lexy tells him with a laugh. “Bruno was just featured.”

“Well, he did the good part,” Nate mutters.

“I’ll pretend you didn’t just insult Travie McCoy, you know I would do him, right?” Lexy asks before giggling again, presumably at Nate’s reaction which once again we can’t see. “Oh sure, but it’s just fine when YOU tell me about the GIRLS that you’d ‘do’? Double-standards babes, such double-standards! Besides, you cannot tell me you didn’t like ‘Grenade’.”

“Sucked,” Nate replies instantly.

“‘Locked Out of Heaven’?” Lexy asks with a disapproving look at his previous answer.

“Yeah, he’s locked out because he sucks,” Nate replies.

“Ok, I forbid you to tell me you didn’t like ‘Just The Way You Are’, if you tell me you didn’t like that song I swear I will divorce you,” she says sternly. “And if you think I’m kidding, just try me!”

“Well, I can tell you I loved it but I’d just be lying,” he says with a laugh of his own. “Actually, you know what, I am going to tell you what I think about that song,” he begins, and we see Lexy finish stretching and lift her leg up, doing a vertical standing split and pushing her leg up against the wall while still looking at him disapprovingly. “I... err... think it’s the most fantastic song ever written! Fuck, you know I have to agree with you when you do that...”

“I know, but now it’s officially recorded for all time that you said that,” she says, smiling at him happily. “Oh, and babes? I have a surprise for you. Do you want to see it?”

“Does it involve you taking off those shorts?” he asks excitedly. “Because if it does I’m totally there!”

“It kind of does...” she says with a smile.

“Kind of does?” he repeats with obvious confusion. “That’s just confusing. Will you be wearing clothes or not?”

“Follow me and find out,” she says playfully, skipping across the room to the bedroom and motioning for him to follow. He lifts the camera up, presumably about to put it down before he wheels himself over to her, but she shakes her head. “Oh no, no, no, bring the camera...”

“Whoa, wait, is this it? Are you FINALLY going to let me film it?” he asks excitedly. “Was it the multi-gym? Because I’ll sell everything I own and buy you fifty if it was!”

She smiles at him seductively and opens the bedroom door behind her before slipping inside and out of camera shot. Nate let’s out an excited laugh as he puts the camera back in his lap and rolls over to the doorway, hesitating for a moment before going in and turning to where we see a mirror hanging on the wall. He adjusts his hair and breathes in to his hand, checking his breath before shrugging and then spins the chair back so the camera is facing the doorway and rolls inside. He pauses there, with the camera filming the opposite wall, for several seconds before we hear Lexy beginning to laugh. “Oh sweet Jesus I love you,” he says before grabbing the camera and almost dropping it, turning it to film Lexy hanging upside down from a stripper pole with a huge grin on her face. “I KNEW that suggestion box was a good idea!”

“You mean the stripper pole box?” Lexy asks with a laugh, looking straight in to the camera while still hanging upside down. “Basically, he put a ‘suggestion’ box out in the lounge after Christmas saying that we should put ideas of how to improve our lives and general happiness in there, but the only ‘suggestion’ he ever put in there was that we buy a stripper pole.”

“It was a valid suggestion,” he says defensively. “It’s incredibly good exercise, it would give you a way to work out right here in the bedroom and, err... and, um... and... I just really want to watch you on a stripper pole. But what made you...?”

“Well we had a little money left over and I wanted to do something nice for you,” she tells him with a happy smile. “And I think you’re really, really going to enjoy this! I actually want to grab the camera right now and show everyone how happy you are.”

“Err, don’t,” he says with hesitation. “Seeing you up there like that made Big Nate ‘very happy’ as well, and...”

“Oh, did it now?” Lexy asks, laughing a little before lowering herself down slowly and seductively, then grabbing the pole and flipping herself back to her feet before looking at it with a smirk. “Ooh, actually this IS fun! You should put on some music and I’ll put on a show...”

“Put on some music, take off my pants, I’ll do it all,” Nate tells her happily before turning the camera so we can see his face. “Screw you guys, my wife has a stripper pole, I have no time for you anymore!”

We hear Lexy laughing again as the scene abruptly cuts to black.

The Chapel Show

The scene changes and we find ourselves back in the Chapel front room. The daylight in the room is very different than in the previous scene as though it’s much earlier in the day indicating that there has been at least a day’s difference between the two, but most likely longer. The camera is once again at what we’d consider to be a normal height, indicating it’s once again being held by the female starlet of our show, rather than the male lead. We see the camera tracking slowly around the lounge where we see the new sofa has an empty pizza box on it and we pan over to the dining table where we see empty Chinese food containers and we hear Lexy laugh. “Ok, I need to train Nate to be our housekeeper if he’s going to be home all day anyway,” she says before walking in to the kitchen and putting the camera down on the counter. We see her walk back in front of it to the kettle, switching it on before moving over to the fridge where we see her grab a carton of orange juice before shaking it and then unscrewing the cap and looking inside, sniffing it a little before shrugging her shoulders and grabbing a glass and pouring it out, taking a nervous sip before smiling happily. “Ok, still good. That’s much better than the last time I did that. Right, morning everyone! I’ve got a busy day ahead and the camera is low on battery, so I probably don’t have too long. I kept meaning to charge it last night but I kept getting distracted. Anyway, big news! I’ve been invited to train with you-know-who again today, so I’m super psyched about that! I’ve got a flight booked and I’m staying over for a few nights – in a hotel, don’t get any dirty thoughts about a threesome between Jon, Fiona and me... although that would probably be a lot of fun – but it means I’m not going to be home for a few days, so if Nate posts any disturbing videos while I’m gone or actually manages to successfully kill himself then I want this video to stand as evidence that I had nothing to do with any of it!”

She laughs and takes another sip of her orange juice before rubbing her eyes. It’s obviously morning and aside from brushing her hair it doesn’t look from the fact that she’s still in her pyjamas that she’s made any effort at all this morning and yet somehow she’s still stunning. “So, apologies for the early morning video if I do end up using this one, I just don’t have a lot of time before I’ve got to go get the plane, so... yeah! One thing I’m learning about professional wrestling is how much damn travelling there is. Nate and I were talking last night though and this is something of an exclusive right now, and it’s not certain to happen, but we’re thinking about moving to California. Right now we still can’t afford a car – well, there was that one we almost bought but I swear the back wheels looked like they were going to fall off before we could even hand over the money, so no – but we’re thinking that with the way things are going it actually really seems like I have a future in EXODUS Pro, and I’m starting to make friends, and it would just make a whole lot more sense to move to California, wouldn’t it?” she asks the camera before letting out a sigh. “Of course that does mean finding another job. You know I was watching this wrestling programme last night – I won’t say the company because, well, if I’m going to randomly advertise shit in these videos then the least they could do is pay me for it – and one thing I’ve discovered about some companies is they seem to be full of billionaires. Seriously, guys bragging about how rich they are and blah, blah, blah, and I’m just watching these idiots going ‘screw you asshole, if you’re so rich how’s about helping a girl out, huh?’ but I bet you none of them would. Plus if they did it would be like they were buying me, and I’d totally do an Indecent Proposal thing if the guy was hot enough but... I’m rambling, aren’t I? I do that sometimes.”

“Babe?” we hear Nate calling from another room, presumably the bedroom.

“In the kitchen babes, don’t get up, I’ll bring you a drink,” she calls back before turning back to the camera. “Ok, I had less time than I thought. You want to see what Nate looks like in the mornings?”

“A cup of tea would be fantastic,” Nate calls again and Lexy just smirks at the camera.

“Do I know him or do I know him?” she asks, nodding toward the kettle which has just started the boil before calling back to him again. “No problem babes, it’s on its way.”

She gets up and grabs the milk out of the fridge, picking up a cup and dropping a teabag in to it before spooning out some sugar and popping that in the cup as well, then pouring the boiling water in to the cup and waiting a moment, looking over at the camera with a smirk. She then takes the teabag out and drops it in the trash and pours a little milk in, carefully picking the cup up with the same hand she’s holding her glass of orange juice in. With both drinks in hand she walks back over to the camera and scoops it up with her free hand before walking through the lounge and back toward the bedroom as we hear Nate calling out to her again. “You know what, last night was INCREDIBLE baby,” he says in a very happy tone. “I swear when we publish our own karma sutra that is definitely going to be one of the things that goes in there!”

“I had a feeling you’d think that,” she replies with a laugh. “Are you decent babes? I’ve got the camera on and as funny as it would be to walk in on you jacking off again I’m almost certain that that would be the straw that broke the camel’s back and they’d ban us from ever posting another video again if we put that up.”

“I was not jacking anything,” Nate replies with a sigh. “And even if I was, you know I was thinking about you, right? Ok, thinking about you with another woman and some sexy lesbian action, but still that definitely counts; I looked it up on Google. And yeah, I’m decent. I actually have a surprise for you.”

“Putting a bow on it doesn’t count as ‘decent’,” Lexy tells him with another laugh, hesitating by the doorway. “Seriously though babes, are you decent? Because your tea is starting to burn my hand so I really need to put it down...”

“I swear to you I’m wearing pants,” Nate tells her and she kicks the door open and walks in. The camera follows her movements as she’s walking and we see the sight in front of her at the exact same time she does – the sight being Nate Chapel standing up at the end of the bed. Lexy stops dead in her tracks and drops the tea cup she was carrying before Nate smirks at her. “Surprise! Aw, my tea...”

“You’re... standing up?!” she asks in complete shock. “How are you...? I mean how long have you been able to...?”

“This is the first time I’ve actually tried it,” Nate says with a smile before the smile begins to turn to a look of obvious pain. “Hurts like a mother fucker though...”

“Well sit down then you moron,” she practically screams at him before putting her own glass and the camera down and rushes over to him. He sits down at the end of the bed holding his back in pain but otherwise looking rather proud of himself. She kisses him before looking over at the wheelchair by the bed and then looking at him again. “Seriously, you can... already? I thought they said it would be a few weeks before you could even TRY?!”

“They did, but I keep telling you medical science cannot explain any part of me, including Big Nate,” he says before smiling at her again and then flinching in obvious pain still. “I wanted to give it a try. I know they said a few weeks but I thought if I could do it today then that’s progress. Then they said I’d be in the wheelchair a few more months but I figured if I’ve come this far this fast then maybe I’ll out of it in a few weeks, maybe another month. And if I can get out of the wheelchair then they said it would be a year before I could start training again and I’m thinking maybe sooner...”

“I can’t believe this,” Lexy says happily, kissing him repeatedly before stopping and looking at him with a very serious look. “Wait, you know there’s no reason to rush this, right? The last thing I want is for you to push yourself too hard too fast and end up hurting yourself worse, or putting back your recovery. You’ve got to be careful with this babes, you almost died!”

“No, what I’ve got to do is get out of that freaking chair and get life back to normal, then I can at least start coming to California with you and at the very least acting as a cheerleader, even if I can’t train with you,” he says with a smile. “Remember when we used to talk about all the ideas we had for the Chapel Show? Well I want to do those things baby. I want to help you! You mean everything to me, and I’m sick and tired of being a burden on you.”

“You are not a burden,” she promises him, kissing him again before smiling at him. “Actually, since you’re in an energetic mood I’d feel bad leaving you here with all this pent up energy, so how’s about I help you burn a little off before I leave? You can just lay there and I’ll do all the work. Well, most of the work...”

“Morning sex,” Nate says in a celebratory way before throwing his hands up. “That’s the way you should start every morning baby. It’ll get your metabolism going, or... something.”

“I’ll consider that, Dr Chapel,” she says with a smirk before looking over at the camera like she’s just remembered she left it on. She jumps off the bed and smiles at the camera. “Sorry guys, you don’t get to see the kinky parts. Hmm, well, I guess it wouldn’t hurt for you to HEAR them...”

She turns the camera around so that it’s facing the wall before we hear Nate laughing. “Oh, you bad girl,” he says playfully. “You know I’m going to make you scream now just so we have evidence.”

“I think the neighbours already count as evidence,” she tells him with a laugh. We see the battery light appear in the bottom corner of the screen and begin blinking red, but continue to listen in to the scene behind us as we hear the sound of kissing and what sounds like clothing being thrown on to the floor. The camera lens is then obstructed with something lacy and pink hanging over it and we hear Lexy laughing. “Good shot.”

“When it comes to aiming your underwear, I’m becoming a master,” he says jokingly.

We hear the two of them kissing the sound of the bed creaking a little before we hear Lexy giggling and moaning a little. “I love when you do that,” she almost whispers, as though she’s hoping the camera won’t hear it, and then we hear the sound of her groaning, and then moaning a little, and then a little more before we hear the sound of her breathing heavily and more moaning in pleasure. The red light continues blinking and then the scene abruptly ends with the sound of Lexy groaning in pleasure once again.

The Chapel Show

The scene changes and we see Lexy back to the same outfit and the same setup as we saw at the beginning of the video, with only one small change – in her hand she now has a bottle of water that she takes a drink from. “So, big news from this week is basically that we’re both frisky, but then you knew that already, and Nate is recovering,” she says with a smile. “And that’s exciting. It’s so incredibly exciting to think about him back on his feet, out of the wheelchair and ready to get on with life again, but one thing that’s becoming very obvious is that he won’t be back in the ring any time soon. The doctors are saying it could be as much as a year. We’re hoping sooner, but we have to be realistic and consider the fact that it may be a long time. So The Chapel Show in terms of tag team action may be something that doesn’t get off the ground for quite a while yet, and while that’s incredibly negative in a lot of ways for little ol’ me it’s also incredibly positive in others, because it means that I’m one hundred percent committing myself to singles action. The last few weeks, the matches with Blake Jones and Spirit Z, haLexy Chapelve been some of the best experiences of my life and I know that it’s only the beginning for me. I also know that everyone is happy with the way things are going when they’re going well, and that nobody is truly tested until things stop going so well and start becoming more difficult. Well, this week I’m aware just how much more difficult things are going to become, because this week I have by far the toughest challenge I’ve faced so far.”

She takes a deep breath and then a sip of water, looking in to the camera with a very serious look. “Now you guys know from my first few videos that I love having fun, and I do. You guys also know from the videos that I live a very free spirited lifestyle, I have a lot of sex, and generally I like having a good time. Nobody enjoys making fun of opponents more than I do, and normally if I found out that I was facing somebody like Jerry Matthews I would be making jokes right now. I’d be mocking the fact that he considers himself a Reverend. I’d be mocking the fact that a so-called man of God is so willing to inflict pain on people without hesitation. I’d be mocking the fact that this so-called man of God is so willing to put people like me through tables. I’d be asking him about his views on lesbianism before telling him that I’ve always wanted to try it out, and asking him if that means I’m going to hell. Actually, DOES it mean I’m going to hell in the eyes of the whacko religious zealots out there? That’s something I’m genuinely curious about. Or am I only going to hell the day that I take off another girls knickers and starting eating her pussy?” she asks before thinking about it a second and then shaking her head. “Anyway, off the subject. You guys know me. You guys know I like a good joke. But this week there’s nothing to laugh about. This week I’m not getting in to the ring WITH a psychopathic lunatic who justifies his actions by claiming to be speaking the word of God. This week there is NOTHING to laugh about, because I’m very aware just what I’m in for. And to make things even more interesting this man is the current, reigning International Champion? A man of proven malicious desires, a man with championship pedigree, and here I am, little ol’ me, being fed to the wolf.”

“I’m sure there are a lot of stories you could tell me, aren’t there Jerry, about the fate of women ‘like me’ from that little book of yours. Do you want to preach to me about the fate of Jezebel, a ‘false prophet’ associated with prostitution because she put on makeup before being thrown to her death? I know the story. I actually looked it up just for you! Her body was eaten by dogs, is that right? And that, people like you would argue, is a fitting fate for anyone like me, a girl who leads people astray, a girl who corrupts the purity of assholes like you,” she says before shaking her head slowly. “Well, you’re wrong Jerry. You couldn’t be more wrong! I’m going to try and justify my life to you but I already know before I do that you won’t listen, nor will you care. Closed minded bigots like you never do! And make no mistake about it Jerry, that’s exactly what you are. You’re a closed minded bigot who looks down his nose at people who don’t fit in to his perfect mould, and I know damn well that I’m one of those people. I’m one of those people because I like to laugh and not drop to my knees and thank God for everything I have. I’m one of those people because I like sex – I’m a girl who enjoys sex, and that just makes me the enemy of so many men like you. It doesn’t matter that I’m married, it doesn’t matter that I’m committed to my husband, it doesn’t matter that I’m faithful to him because in your world everything should be a certain way, shouldn’t it? But your world isn’t the real world. Your world isn’t THIS world! And in this world, in this country, I’m free to act the way I do. I’m free to behave the way I do. This country was founded by people like me Jerry, not people like you. It was founded by the free thinkers, the revolutionaries, it was founded by those who didn’t want to be persecuted and the greatest people in the history of this country have been the ones who have seen the way they’re meant to be and said no!”

“I see the way you want me to be. I see the way people like you want people like me to be. And I say no!” she says proudly. “You see I’ve dealt with people like you before. I’ve not dealt with anyone like you in the ring, the truth is that there are very few people as good as you in the ring and for me this week that is something I’m incredibly aware of, but I’ve dealt with people like you my entire life. People have always told me what to do. They’ve told me what to say. They’ve told me where to go. They’ve told me what to be. They’ve even told me who to date. People have tried to control me, to mould me in to the image THEY want for me, for as long as I can remember and for as long as I can remember there’s been a voice inside of me that has just said NO! And I’m saying it again now Jerry. I’m saying NO! I won’t be what people like you tell me to be. I won’t fit in to the mould you tell me to fit in to. If I want to dress the way I dress then that’s what I’m going to do. And if you think I’ll back down when people like you threaten me, when groups like God & Monsters form to try to intimidate the rest of the roster, then I won’t. Because that’s what you rely on, isn’t it Jerry? People like you, like this group, rely on intimidation. They rely on strength in numbers. I saw what happened last week after the tag team match. I saw what you guys did. And if you think that that didn’t stay with me after the show then you’re wrong because it did. And if you think that didn’t pop in to my head the moment I saw your name on the card and I knew this match was going to be with you then you’re wrong because it DEFINITELY did. I know how easily you and your band of misfits could hurt me. And I know how much you’ll want to as well, simply because of the people I’ve chosen to admire and the people I’ve chosen to respect.”

“I know you’ve got a long, long history with Jonathan Collins. Just the fact that I’ve mentioned his name before now has probably meant that to you I’m not an ally but that I’m an enemy. But I don’t care. Let me tell you about Jonathan Collins, Jerry. Let me tell you that, not looking for any personal gain from it, Jonathan Collins is the kind of man who extends his hand to people like me. Jonathan Collins is the kind of man who offers friendship to people like me. Jonathan Collins is the kind of man who is an inspiration to people like me. Because he’s not perfect, I’d never be so naive to believe that he was perfect, but one thing I know about Jonathan is that he is a man. I don’t mean he’s got male body parts; don’t mistake me for a moment. I’m very aware of his male body parts, I’m very aware just how good he looks without a shirt – oops, there I go being a slut again, God must really want to see me punished – but I want there to be no misunderstanding about exactly what I’m saying when I say Jonathan Collins is a man! He’s an honourable man. He’s a good man. And people like you, people who inflict pain on others, people who inflict their will on others, people who look down on others... you’re not men. You’re animals,” she says with a shake of her head. “What happened to all the good lessons that that book you preach from tried to instil upon you Jerry? What happened to ‘turn the other cheek’? What happened to ‘love thy neighbour’? I don’t see a whole lot of that from men like you. Do you love your neighbour Jerry? If not, what makes you so sure that you can stand in judgement of someone like me? Because you know the word of God? Because you give thanks to him? So what? Do you really think that an all-powerful being is grateful to have a follower like you? Because if I were in his position, you’re the kind of man I’d be looking to smooch under my thumb.”

She laughs a little at the idea, making the motion with her thumb and pressing it in to the palm of the opposite hand like she’s trying to crush something. “But you don’t see things that way. Of course you don’t. You don’t see people like me as honourable people, as good people. You put people like me through tables. You drive people like me through steel chairs. And the fact that you’re the International Champion while you do things like this makes me sad for that title. It makes me sad for the fate of a championship when it’s carried by a person like you,” she says before letting out a long sigh. ”But it is carried by you, isn’t it? And you’re damn good inside that ring, aren’t you? If you weren’t then all these sermons you give, all this bullshit you preach, would have been cast aside a long time ago. But you can back it all up in the ring, and you showed that last week when you joined in a beating of a tag team and you went one on one with Zack Lifer. Now I’m not going to stand here and mock your defeat Jerry, because what I saw last week didn’t look much to me like a man who was defeated. You lost the match admittedly, but that match stood as tribute to your ability inside the ring. By the end of the match neither of you could really stand, and Zack got the big shot in that won him the match but you didn’t look weakened in that loss. I’m not stupid enough to stand here and tell you that BECAUSE he beat you it’ll mean I can beat you to because I know damn well that’s not the way it works. In fact if anything the loss to somebody like Zack Lifer, someone as polarizing in people’s opinions as Zack Lifer, has probably only made you more determined to step up this week, and it’s given me more reason to be afraid.”

“I’ve talked about fear on the Chapel Show before, about experiencing fear, about the way I handle fear, but this week I have so many reasons to be afraid when I step in to the ring with you Jerry. Spirit Z threw me around the ring, he dominated me physically, and he was nothing compared to you. You’re so much bigger than me, so much heavier than me, so much scarier than me, and I’ll admit that I’ve lost sleep thinking about this match this week and wondering I have it in me to fight someone like you. Compared to you I’m just a gnat, aren’t I Jerry? I’m just a gnat that a man like you can squash under his boot,” she says, the actual fear showing on her face as she says it and bites her bottom lip a little. “I have every reason to be afraid, and I am. But fear won’t control me. Fear won’t cripple me. Fear won’t stop me! If I didn’t do all the things that scared me I’d never get out of bed in the morning just in case stepping on the floor meant I twisted my ankle. If I cowered every time I was scared by something I’d never live my life, I’d never have stood up to my parents, I’d never have to come to America and I’d never have married my husband. So I’m very, very afraid about this week but I’m going to use that emotion, I’m going to channel that fear, and I AM going to try to do to you what Zack Lifer did to you last week. I’m going to step in to that ring and while I won’t stand nose to nose with you I’ll damn sure stand across that ring from you and I’ll damn sure look you in the eyes and if you’re going to judge me Jerry, if you’re going to judge me and try to hurt me then I suggest you don’t do that now, I suggest you wait until we’re standing in that ring together in San Francisco, I suggest you wait until you look me in the eyes and I suggest you save any ego until that moment as well because you’re a giant of a man Jerry but you are only that, you are only human and human beings fail.”

“I know that that means I can fail as well. I know that that means that my undefeated run in EXODUS Pro will fail as well. But you know what Jerry? If I have to lose, there’s no shame in losing a match while standing in the ring with someone like you. There’s no shame in losing to an International Champion, a ring-veteran and a warrior like you. I won’t bow my head if it happens. I won’t slink away if it happens. I’ll continue to stand tall if it happens. I’ll continue to stand proud if it happens. Well, I’ll continue to stand proud assuming that after what you do to me at EXPRO on FX #13 I can even stand at all,” she says, considering the possibility for a moment before shaking her head. “Oh yeah, I know it’s going to hurt. And this week Jerry you can hurt my body. You can maybe even break my body. But you can’t break my spirit. You can’t break my drive. You can’t break my fight and my love for this business, because make no mistake about it I do love this business and this business is in my veins. It pumps through me. This business radiates in me stronger than anything else. You know what else radiates within me Jerry? Desire! Oh, there are many jokes to be made there, but I’m completely serious. Not a desire to lay on my back and open my legs but a desire to stand up against men like you, to fight men like you, and to prove myself inside that ring. I have a desire to beat men like you, to overcome the greatest odds and to one day raise that championship that you call your own high over my head. I know that day won’t be tomorrow. I know that day will be a long time in coming. And I know where I’m starting on that road, by giving my all to the San Diego Bay championship, by giving everything I have to win that championship, to raise that championship over my head, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have ambition, and who wouldn’t want to one day call themselves the International Champion?”

“I have fight in me Jerry. I intend to show you that in San Francisco. I intend to show the WORLD that in San Francisco. When I get in that ring, when I FIGHT in that ring, I intend to show the world how good I am and even though I know what’s most likely to happen, I’ve defied a few odds before, haven’t I? You see while I know you’re bigger than me, stronger than me and will be looking down on me in every possible sense this week I also know that I do pretty well against people who look down on me. So who’s to say I couldn’t do pretty well against you? Who’s to say I couldn’t pull off the most remarkable upset of my career? Who’s to say I couldn’t put down the preacher of EXODUS Pro? Who’s to say I couldn’t overcome you Jerry? You’re to say it I suppose, but I’m not ruling myself out,” she says with a confident look. “I want this Jerry. I want this more than anyone. I have dreams, I have ambitions, and I’m going to do whatever I can to make them come true. I’m enjoying being undefeated and I don’t want to give that up just because I’m meant to. So this week, I won’t be put down in ten seconds flat. This week, I won’t be pummelled in to the ground the moment the bell rings. This week you may hurt me, you may injure me, but you will not break my spirit. This week I’m going to fly high, or at least try to, and you know what Jerry? If you beat me this week I’ll do the honourable thing, I’ll shake your hand or I’ll slink away, whichever you’d prefer, but if I beat you let me ask you, will your ego, will your pride allow you to make me the same offer? Because I know what I want out of you if it does. I want you to shake my hand. If I beat you this week I want to make you in to a believer, because I’m a believer Jerry, and I don’t mean that I believe in all the things you preach about, I mean I believe in myself! Other people are starting to as well. So my final question to you Jerry is this: inside the Warfield Theater in San Francisco, California, in front of a capacity crowd, if I beat you will you believe in Lexy Chapel? And that may not be the word from up high, but that IS the word of little Lexy. Thanks be to me...”

She giggles a little at the final line before looking more serious again. “Ok, I think that’s all I want to say,” she says before taking a deep breath. “Now, you know it’s time for the business bit, right? Did you like what you saw? Don’t forget to subscribe and rate the video, we appreciate every like and every subscription. I’ve been Lexy Chapel, and this has been the Chapel Show. Until next time fuckers!”

She smiles at the camera and the Chapel Show logo comes up on the screen as the video ends and the replay button appears.

The Chapel Show

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