THE CHAPEL SHOW
Episode: S02E17
Date: 15/11/2015

The video begins and we see the usual sight of the bedroom of Nate and Lexy Chapel in Thousand Oaks at the home they share with Lexy’s Wicked Intent tag team partner, and partner in crime, Kat Kelly. On the bed in front of us, as always, rests the IWC Tag Team Championship belt and sitting alongside it, in her normal outfit of her underwear and a t-shirt, this one reading ‘I HAVE SEX DAILY – I mean dyslexia’, sits the star of the show herself, Lexy Chapel. She smiles at the camera confidently. “What’s up fuckers? I’m Lexy Chapel, this is the Chapel Show, and this week is the biggest week of my life,” she says with a ton of excitement on the final few words before pausing for a moment to consider them. “Hmm, I was going to say ‘career’, and then half way through I switched to ‘life’, then I started thinking about it for a moment and sure there have been some pretty major contenders, like the week I ran away from England with Nate to move to America, and the week we got married, the week I started my career and the week I signed my IWC contract but… yeah, actually now that I think about it this week has the potential to be better than all of them! Well, it definitely has the potential to be more painful than all of them because I’m about to embark on the second most painful thing a woman can do – and no, the first isn’t child birth, it’s anal sex without lube. Seriously people, use lube – and that’s compete potentially three times in one night!”

She pauses again, thinking about that for a moment as well. “I know, that’s fucking crazy, am I right? But that’s what I’ll be doing this Tuesday night. Little Lexy Chapel – emphasis on little, because c’mon guys look at me, I’m tiny – getting in the ring a guaranteed twice in the same night, a possible three times in the same night, but also two matches away from achieving something that no mother fucker ever thought I’d achieve and one match away from continuing the greatest thing going in IWC right now. Fuck, that’s a lot of things to talk about, and that doesn’t even cover where I wanted to start things either,” she says before shaking her head in faux disbelief. “Where do I even begin, am I right? For most people this kind of challenge would just be too much for them. For most people this is the kind of challenge where they’d crack under the pressure, especially when they were just two years into the business, especially when they were still the Padawan and far from the Master, although I guess I’m more like the Apprentice, considering I turned to the dark side a long time ago and I’ve been kicking it there ever since. But you know, it’s true what they say, the dark side is a lot more fun, and I’ve tried both, I’ve tried the whole ‘good girl, honourable fighter’ thing but ultimately it just wasn’t for me. I’m a bad girl. I just like kicking people in the face too much. It’s my curse…”

She laughs again before shaking her head. “Ok, more seriously, and this week is a fucking huge week for me. In fact it’s been a huge month for me. And ever since Ryan Watson took on training duties with me he’s been working me super hard, but he’s also been preparing me for what is to come, and I think he’s done a pretty good job. He’s helped lift my expectations. He’s helped prepare me for the potential success I could have. While, at the same time, he’s also been helping me keep my feet on the ground, because it’s only when your feet leave the ground that bitches tend to kick you in the head and then punch you in your face multiple times and knock you from your perch, you know what I’m saying?” she asks before smirking at the camera knowing. “Yeah, you know. But fortunately for me I only have one perch, and that’s the perch of being one half of the greatest mother fucking tag team in IWC history, and that’s not a perch I intend to get knocked off of any time soon. But that’s not to say I’m not actively looking for a second perch on which to stand. But that’s kind of where the two different challenges come in this Tuesday night, isn’t it? And why Little Lexy finds herself in the undeniably tough position of having to compete at least twice, if not three times. And I’ll admit, it’s rough. It’s a rough position to be in. But yet I’m still smiling…”

She points at herself and smiles as if to prove her point. “No, seriously, I am smiling right now, and why wouldn’t I be? Just look at the position I’m in. I’d be smiling pretty hard even if I was only in action once this Tuesday night because honestly that would mean that I was where I wanted to be, that would mean that I was competing at Upping the Ante, that would mean that I was competing live on pay per view, and defending the IWC Tag Team Championships, and just that by itself is incredible. It’s incredible for me to think about doing that. But to think I could do something else on Tuesday as well? Well, lucky for me I have Ryan around to help me keep my feet on the ground because without him my ego may take my head up into the clouds, and I’ve seen a lot of bitches with their head in the clouds recently,” she says with another smirk. “Most of those bitches have ended up face up on the mat as well, staring up at the stars and hearing my music playing all around them. Yet in a way I can’t blame them, I mean it’s an intoxicating feeling to want to be at the top. It’s unlike anything else. You get just the smallest taste of that and you want more, and I’ve gotten a taste of it lately. I got a taste of it when I pinned Katelyn Buehler in the main event of Riot, my first-ever main event, I’d like to add. I got that feeling again when I pinned her shoulders to the mat a second time as well.”

“But you guys know about that, am I right? You’ve been paying attention. You know about the rise of Lexy Chapel. You know about her climb from nothingness and how she’s made herself one of the hottest properties in professional wrestling. Hell, you may even know all about how our buddy Shawn Mason got us a spot at the rivals just recently. Did you see that? I know, it’s not all that shocking to see IWC and SCW sharing talent. I mean it’s getting ridiculous how many people that used to be there show up here, or how many people seem to jump between the two when things go wrong for them, but I promise you, people of IWC, that Wicked Intent will not abandon you like others have,” she says before nodding her head sincerely. “Your IWC Tag Team Champions wouldn’t do that to you! Our appearance over there was strictly a one-time deal, just so that we could enjoy introducing the pretenders to the crown of Tag Team Wrestling to the Superkick Soiree! Because everyone knows that if you want to see the very best tag team wrestling in the world you tune into IWC, am I right? Not because IWC has the most competitive tag team division because… err… I mean do we actually HAVE a tag team division? Most of our title defences have just been against random duos that teamed up. Hmm, I’ll have to check on that and get back to you. But what IWC does have is Wicked Intent, your IWC Tag Team Champions, and that’s not changing.”

“And when I say ‘that’ I of course mean that Wicked Intent are not abandoning you for different pastures, but I also mean that our status as IWC Tag Team Champions is not changing either,” she says before picking up the tag team title that lays on the bed and holding it up before looking at it happily. “You see this? This isn’t going anywhere! And I know what you’re thinking, but let me assure you that you are wrong. Yes, Wicked Intent have a hell of a challenge ahead of them on Tuesday, yes Wicked Intent will be going up against another of those weird Frost-Family based teams, and yes everything that Eve and what’s-her-name have done so far has been very impressive. I mean Eve did dethrone Selena Frost, knocking her off her throne as the Queen of the Ring, and that’s very impressive and everything but I’d like to point out that it was Wicked Intent who put her on that throne to begin with, and it was little ol’ me who pinned her shoulders to the mat already. Yeah, that’s right, I did that, so, you know, great accomplishment and all but it’s not anything that wows me. In fact very little about them really wows me, if I’m being honest. I will say that I was a little bit impressed that they burst on the scene. I was a little bit impressed that they made an impact. And they won a four-team match to become the contenders to these belts, so that’s pretty impressive…”

She pauses for a moment before smiling again. “You know what else is impressive, now that I think about it? They’re an actual tag team! I mean they’ve actually had tag matches and everything. That’s got to make them a threat to us, hasn’t it? But even more impressive than that is the fact that they earned the chance to fight us. Bravo Uprising. I have to give you that. You might be the inferior brand but you’ve got the right idea when it comes to making people fight for the right to… get in the ring with Wicked Intent. More people should have to do that! Honestly we should hold weekly tournaments to find out if people are even worthy of stepping up against us. That’d be pretty cool, and it would keep away some of the riff-raff, am I right?” she asks before beginning to laugh. “Sorry, I think my inner-Monarchy-associate took over for a second there. It is impressive that they fought for this chance though, and they get this opportunity at arguably the best time for them as well. Eve is on a roll, she’s the new Queen of the Ring Champion, and the other one is… also there. And they face off against Wicked Intent when we’re arguably at our weakest, when I’ve got to compete elsewhere, where my focus will be split, and where CLEARLY I’ll have my head completely focused on Marina Valdivia and the potential of making it to the Number One Contendership finals, am I right? I mean OBVIOUSLY that’s what’s going to happen, right?”

“I mean shit, this is the World title we’re talking about here, how could my focus NOT be on that? How could I have my head anywhere but there?” she asks sarcastically before rolling her eyes and shaking her head, looking at the IWC Tag Team Championship belt again. “No, my focus is exactly where it needs to be. My focus is on this belt. And that’s not going to change. I’m NEVER going to stop caring about this. You can put all the opportunities you want in front of me and that’s NEVER going to change. I am one half of the greatest tag team in IWC not because we have the best marketing team who really love hyping up the Wicked Intent brand but because I have a passion and determination to BE one half of the greatest fucking tag team you’ve ever seen! And no matter what else might be happening around here that’s the difference between me and every other bitch who’s got a title belt, including Eve. Sure, I know that they’d just love to take the titles from us. They’d love to hold them up on Uprising and rant and rave about the agenda, and the Frost family, and the dominance that Ba’al had in IWC once upon a time, and blah, blah, blah, but that’s not happening. Wicked Intent are not leaving. Wicked Intent are not losing our titles. Wicked Intent is walking out of Tuesday night with these belts just the same as we have against any other challenge that’s come before us.”

“And just like every other challenge that’s come these two present a unique problem. Part of that problem is the fact that… well, they’re rule-breaking bitches. We know. We’re rule-breaking bitches too! We just don’t carry around tubs of blood with us to pour over people because… I mean seriously, what the fuck is wrong with them? What the fuck was that shit? Who does that? Not only was it insanely gross, and not only did it require many, many showers after until I felt clean again, but where the fuck did they even GET that blood? Was it clean? Had it been tested? That shit almost got in my mouth! What if I’d swallowed some? What could I have caught? Seriously, Kat gets suspended just for kicking a pervert in the face who wouldn’t stop ogling her but pouring fucking blood over someone is considered acceptable? Fucking really?! That shit is just wrong on so many levels,” she says, shaking her head. “Unfortunately for them it’ll all be in vain after this Tuesday anyway, because after they fail to take the titles from us they can slink back to the butchers, or the blood donors, or… the creepy Fight Club basement, or wherever the fuck they got that shit, save in the knowledge that they tried to play with our heads and all it got them was personalised tickets to the Superkick Soiree. They are tickets I’m looking forward to delivering as well…”

“But, as I was saying, they do present a unique problem. Another part of that problem is the fact that they’re not doing this for themselves. Well, Eve might be. The other one is just doing what she’s told, or so I’m led to understand. But ultimately they’re both doing this for their masters, for their lords, for the guys pulling their strings and making them dance, and quite frankly that just upsets me. I mean sure people can criticise Wicked Intent for being aligned with certain groups, they can criticise Wicked Intent for being mentored by certain individuals, but Kat and I have never needed to be told what to do. We don’t wait around waiting on orders. We do what we want to do because we want to do it. And we wanted to be the best tag team out there, so we did it. Dancing to the beat of someone else’s drum? Nah, that’s only one step above living in the Middle East and being told you can’t drive a car because you were born with lady parts and your only purpose in life is to pump out little boys for they are superior,” she says before shaking her head. “The fact is that if they were coming after us because they wanted to come after us, if they were coming after us because they wanted to prove themselves to be a top tag team, then that would be one thing. That I could actually respect. But I can’t respect anyone who does something because they’re told to do it.”

“That’s not the way I live my life,” she says, shaking her head. “I’m a big believer in being all that you can be. I’m also a big believer that these tag team belts stand for something more than that. I’m also a big believer, quite honestly, they should be where they are right now. Sure, I know a deal was made to keep Kat and me together, I know a part of that deal was the fact that occasionally we’d need to kick some Uprising bitches in their face holes, but these belts belong on the big boy show, you know? They belong in the spotlight. They belong being worn by the top bitches in the field. And that’s where they are going to stay. Because like I said I have a focus this Tuesday night and it’s on walking out STILL the IWC Tag Team Champion. This party is not over. Wicked Intent will continue to be the greatest fucking thing on the show. We’ll continue entertaining. We’ll continue being controversial. And we’ll continue making the Tag Team championships look oh-so-good! So I’m sorry to our challengers. I’m sorry that this isn’t a year ago. I’m sorry that Ba’al took his ball and went home once, but the tag team championships are staying with us, and for all I care Eve and her little obedient friend can wander back to Uprising and continue fighting for the name of the Sinistry, safe in the knowledge that the only name that truly matters around here is Wicked Intent.”

She smiles again, nodding her head sincerely. She puts the tag team championship belt down again before looking back into the camera. She takes a little breath in before letting it out slowly and clearing her mind. “Now, you’ve just heard me say all of that, so I know the thing you’re naturally thinking right now. You’re going to tell me that because I’m focused on retaining the tag titles, because I’m focused on that, I can’t POSSIBLY be focused on the tournament, am I right? Yeah, we just did this but the other way around, and I said that you were wrong and that I was focused on the tag titles, so naturally the assumption is that I can’t do both. It’s what everyone says when their opponent has two objectives. It’s what everyone says when their opponent has two things they’re actively pursuing. They scrunch up their faces and pout and look all sad and say ‘no, no, no, you can’t do both, you can only play with one toy at once and that’s MY toy and I want to play with it, you can’t have it’. That’s pretty much the way most people deal with the IWC World Championship. ‘Nobody else can have it because I want it more than anyone else’. ‘I deserve it the most’. ‘I should be the top contender’. You know, all the cliché bullshit that you hear from every contender. And this is the part of the Chapel Show where I join right in, because this week I’m fully aware of the tournament, I’m fully aware of the difficulty I’ll be facing, I don’t know if I’ll be facing Marina first or defending the tag titles first but I do know it’s going to be FUCKING EXHAUSTING either way, and that’s without considering the possibility that I make the final, but this is the part where I tell you that you’re wrong, that I care about the World title and… I’m not going to do that.”

She pauses again before nodding her head slowly. “I’m not going to sit here and tell you that you’re wrong and that my focus is actually on the tournament. I’m not going to sit here and tell you that I deserve it the most and that I’m going to win it. If I did that I’d be sitting here and I’d be LYING to you, and if there’s one thing that I’ve prided myself on since I walked in the door it’s that I’m not like other bitches, I’m not going to play into the clichés, and I’m not going to fucking lie about how much I deserve to be the World Champion. But I will say this, over the last few months I’ve been engaged in something of a rivalry with the current reigning World Champion, and I’ve beaten her… twice! Does that make me deserving of the title? I can’t tell you that. I can leave you to make up your own mind, and frankly I don’t give a fuck if you decide I’m worthy or not, but I’m not going to sit here and lie to you about the fact that I think I am,” she says before letting out a long sigh again. “I will tell you this, however. There’s another cliché that people say all the time that does apply here. That’s a pretty funny cliché as well, considering everything I just said about the tag titles, but it’s the truth: there is no bitch in this tournament who wants it more than I do! And you can believe that or you can not, but it’s the truth, and this Tuesday night I’m going to prove it.”

“You know I’m a hundred and fourteen pounds, right? I started this off talking about me being Little Lexy and fuck, I AM little! Yet this Tuesday I’m fighting on two different fronts. This Tuesday I’m seriously putting my long-term health on the line. And while I can be all cocky and egotistical when it comes to the Tag Team Championships because I’ve EARNED the right to be a cocky, egotistical little bitch when it comes to those titles the fact is that in spite of beating the champ I’ve still not EARNED the right to be cocky in singles action… yet,” she says before pausing again. Her demeanour has changed a lot now. The IWC Tag Team Championship sits by her side, not over her shoulder, and she looks in a completely different state of mind than she was in when it came to that belt. “You see I know what that title means. I know what being the World Champion means. And it’s not something I take lightly.  It’s not something I believe I have a right to. It’s something that I know I have to bust my ass to EARN. And I know that because I grew up in this business and every week I’d watch someone who wanted so very much to earn his way to that honour. Every week I’d watch Damien Adams go into his locker room and put on his tights, and I’d watch Union Jack reappear through that door, and I’d see the fire and the determination in my father’s eyes.”

“Now you guys know my problems with my dad. Can you blame me for any of them? You’ve been with me as I’ve learned that biologically I’m not related to him at all. But emotionally he’s still my dad. I still grew up watching him. Nothing has changed there. And I, like so many others, watched the guy draped in the Union Jack fight and thought he was a superhero. I mean that. I used to think my dad was a fucking superhero! All the kids did. He fought for something huge. He defended British wrestling against Japanese guys, and German guys, and Mexican guys, and yeah, even American guys. He embodied British wrestling. He was the British Heavyweight Champion. But he could never take that next step. He could never make it on to the grand stage. He could never become the WORLD Champion, and I know that ate him up inside,” she says soberly. “You see I know what that belt means because I know how much my dad spent his entire career nearly killing himself every week just in the hope he’d one day be noticed enough to be considered worthy enough to have his name mentioned in the same breath as it, let alone get a shot at it. But he never did. This larger than life superhero, this Union Jack, never did. No matter how much he wanted it, how many people said he deserved it, he never made it to the elite. That’s the story of my dad’s career. He was a legend… but he could never make it to the big time.”

She pauses for a moment, bowing her head a little before looking up with an almost sinister look in her eyes. “But here’s the thing: I’m not my father. He raised me to know the value of that championship, to know how hard you’ve got to work just to get near to it, and to want it more than anything in life. He raised me to know that THAT championship is the PINNACLE of this business and that holding it is an HONOUR! He raised me to know those things, but I’m not like him. I’m not a fool. I’m not a super-heroine. I don’t go out there in tights. I’m a bitch. I’m a cheat. I’m a rotten, naughty little scoundrel. Yet I do what I have to do to win. I do what he could never do. And one day I AM going to raise that title over my head and become everything that my father couldn’t be. One day I AM going to be able to call myself the Heavyweight Champion of the World, and when I do I won’t arrogantly proclaim ‘this is my house’ like a bitch. When I do I’ll stand for something that means everything to me. When I do I’ll have made it. And that’s why I tell you that this tournament means everything to me. That’s why I tell you that WINNING this tournament would mean EVERYTHING to me,” she says, nodding her head slowly. “And that’s why I’ll tell you straight up right now that I know how hard it’s going to be to fight three matches in an attempt to win it, I know how much the tag team division ON TOP of the title tournament is going to leave me beaten, bloodied and bruised, but you know what? I don’t care. I’m doing it anyway!”

“This Tuesday night I’m going to fight and I’m going to give it my all to win! I’m going to do that because I’m NOT the other three in this tournament. And I could tell you right now how I’ve beaten Marina Valdivia before. I could talk some arrogant shit about her not being on my level. We all know that that’s not true though, don’t we? Yeah, I’ve beaten her before, and every time was a hard fought contest, and every time I needed to do something a little sneaky to get the win. She’ll be the first one to remind you that it was Alistair kicking her in the face that cost her once. She’ll undoubtedly remind you of how hard she fought against me when we met in singles. She’ll expect me to run my mouth about that, but I never have before, so why would I start now? You see I’ve always known the threat she is. I’ve always known it. It’s why I’ve never taken her lightly. Sure I don’t care about her as a person. I couldn’t give a fuck about her life story. I honestly don’t give a damn about her motivation or whether she wants to fight for righteousness or blah, blah, blah. I’ve told you all that before. I don’t give a fuck about Marina Valdivia the person. I fear Marina Valdivia the wrestler because I know every time I get in that ring with her she’s capable of beating me. But I also know that this Tuesday night I NEED to beat her because I won’t be my father. I won’t be close but no cigar. I won’t be an old woman dreaming about what ‘could have been’. I won’t!”

“I know the challenge I’m up against this week better than anyone. I’ve been preparing for it non-stop. That’s why there are no videos this week. What, you didn’t notice? Yeah, there wasn’t a whole lot of time for joking around. There wasn’t a whole lot of time for fun and games. This week was mostly me and Ryan Watson in the gym, me and Ryan Watson in the ring, me and Ryan Watson watching tapes, me busting my ass day and night with ONE purpose in mind and that’s walking into Tuesday night as a ‘maybe’ and leaving as a genuine contender! Because what’s never going to change is that my focus is on being one half of the greatest tag team this company will ever know, but in my heart I know I’m so much more than that and this tournament is my chance to show EVERYONE that I can make it,” she says proudly. “And you all doubt me, don’t you? Nobody thinks I can do it. Even if I make it through Marina, which you’ll tell me is unlikely, I still have to fight the winner of the other match, I still have to come up against the former Evolution Champion – and mother fucker who cheated to beat me once – or, as you’ll again tell me is more likely, a former World Champion in her own right. And you’ll tell me what a threat Andre is, and you’ll tell me what a threat Mika is, and you’ll tell me that even if by some MIRACLE I make it that far I won’t make it past the winner of that match because I’ll be fucking exhausted and they’re WAY too good, right?”

She starts laughing and nodding her head. “Yeah, that’s right. I know that. I know how good Mika is. I know that she can near execute people and laugh while doing it. I know that with or without Aiken Frost and his associates she’s deadly in that ring. And I know she’s already beaten everyone’s former hero once before as well. I know she made it to the top. I know she wants to be there again. I know Andre wants it as well. I know that he’ll bore the shit out of all of us telling us so. And I know, if someone I do beat Marina, I’ll make it to that match and I’ll barely be able to stand, right?” she says, nodding her head and laughing again. “Yep. Fucking three matches in one night. That’s torture, dude. That’s a fucking nightmare. I’ll be crawling down to the ring by the end of it, if I even make it. You’ll be able to push me down with one finger. But that doesn’t mean I’ll STAY down. Because I’m a bitch, I’m a rule-breaker, I’m a dirty, cheating little slut, but I also have HEART, I have PASSION, and I’ll fight in that ring until my last fucking breath to prove myself if I have to. You see there is nothing that would mean more to me than to leave this Tuesday night with THREE wins, with my IWC Tag Team Championship in one hand and a ticket to fight the winner of the main event in the other. There is NOTHING that would make me prouder than to fight through the IMPOSSIBLE odds and twenty thousand bitches telling me I’m not good enough and to prove them ALL wrong at once!”

She smiles again with a passion in her eyes. “Do you remember the night Tay-Tay joined the Monarchy? Do you remember that? Do you remember the doubt everyone had in me after that? Do you remember the fact that everybody forgot I even fucking existed next to her? Did you know I’d walk down the street after that night, after I BEAT Katelyn Buehler, after I BEAT the WORLD CHAMPION, and all people wanted to ask me about was the fact that Taylor turned on her friends and joined with mine? That’s DISRESPECT. That’s what I’m used to though. People look past me all the time. People overlook me. People tell me what I can’t do! Well this Tuesday, even if I’m left crawling in that ring, I’m not going to give up. I’m going to give EVERYTHING I have because this could be my ONE chance, this could be my ONLY chance to do something that my father couldn’t do, that my mother couldn’t do, that my brother’s couldn’t do, that my father-in-law couldn’t do, and yeah even my husband couldn’t do. This could be the chance for LEXY fucking CHAPEL to become a household name and I want that, bitches. This Tuesday night I know how insanely tough this is going to be but you know what? I’m ready. I have Ryan in my corner, I have Kat Kelly watching my back, and this Tuesday night I’m going to fight to for RESPECT for myself and for the position of number one contender because you know what? Maybe I don’t deserve it more than anyone else, but I’ve fought my ass off to get THIS far and this Tuesday night Marina, Mika and Andre need to be aware of one simple thing: Lexy Chapel always comes with Explicit Content.”

She smirks again before taking a deep breath. “So, do you think I can pull it off? I’ve said more in this video than I normally do, but then I have more on my plate in this moment than I’ve ever had before, but I hope you’ve gotten a few insights. I hope you know Lexy Chapel, one half of Wicked Intent, one half of the most exciting thing going in IWC, but I also hope you know Lexy Chapel, the Future Legend, who’s fighting for so much more than you can understand,” she says before smirking again. “And if you want to see more of either one of them, or you just want to see what t-shirt I’ll be wearing next time – hell, maybe no t-shirts at all, if I’m number one contender maybe I’ll give you boys the show you REALLY want to see, huh? – then rate, subscribe, and come back next time because I’ve been Lexy Chapel, this has been the Chapel Show, and this is by far the biggest week of my life. Until next time, fuckers!”

She winks at the camera before we cut to black and fade out with the replay button flashing up on the screen as the video ends.